When I was 30 years old, a friend of mine suggested I attend a self-awareness workshop that he had enjoyed. In the market for change, I signed up for the program.
I met Tony Speed for the first time when he and his wheelchair rolled into the room. He was vice-president for a behavioral science firm in NC and was the lead facilitator for the weekend program I was attending.
From the moment I met Tony and over the course of the next 12 years, my life would be changed forever. He provided no excuses or pity for my shortcomings, false perceptions, and my deep need to rationalize my behavior due to a destructive and wounded childhood. Accepting me right where I was, he simply held me accountable…lovingly…but fiercely…as if he had a map of my soul.
As time passed and our relationship evolved, I would attend programs just to study Tony himself…his approach…the manner in which he delivered information…the language that he used to get others to deepen their understanding of themselves. In another one of my moments of uncertainty, he once responded to a question I posed that was tainted with the need for approval, by stating: “If you have to ask if you are, you’re not.”
Anyone who knew Tony knew he was a master teacher. He was a mentor of the highest caliber. And I can add to that revered list in my life: Father Franklin Martin, Father Louis Haydn, Walter Chamberlain, Dr. Ron Guillard, Bobby Richardson, Nancy Willis, and Joyce Rawlings-Davies.
The need for mentors in our personal life is crucial. The need for mentoring in our leadership development is vital. Overwhelmed and swamped in daily life without a vehicle for personal reflection from someone other than your Self will result in self-deception, plain and simple. Self-deception is the destroyer of dreams-come-true.
Hanging around an organization for 27 years doesn’t make you a mentor. Having been in charge for the last 15 years doesn’t make you a mentor. One of our newest programs, Mentoring: Cultivating Leadership, provides you the opportunity to enhance your role as a mentor and refine your abilities to guide others. Consider bringing the program to your organization or executive team. Becoming an effective leader is important. Knowing how to teach others how to become an effective leader is even more rewarding.

The need for mentors in our personal life is crucial. The need for mentoring in our leadership development is vital. Overwhelmed and swamped in daily life without a vehicle for personal reflection from someone other than your Self will result in self-deception, plain and simple. Self-deception is the destroyer of dreams-come-true.
Hanging around an organization for 27 years doesn’t make you a mentor. Having been in charge for the last 15 years doesn’t make you a mentor. One of our newest programs, Mentoring: Cultivating Leadership, provides you the opportunity to enhance your role as a mentor and refine your abilities to guide others. Consider bringing the program to your organization or executive team. Becoming an effective leader is important. Knowing how to teach others how to become an effective leader is even more rewarding.